California Adventure

My friend Gwen invited us to come visit her family's cabin in California. I have a soft spot for family cabins in the woods, so I was pleased to be invited and many months ago, I made a plan with her to actually go. Labor Day weekend was the time and King's Canyon was the place. Eric went with me and we left Evan with wonderful friends who took great care of him.

Here is what we did:

• Flew into LA. I know, but it was waaayy cheaper. Next time we'll fly into the Bay Area. 
• Drove up through the traffic and the Grapevine and the Great Valley to Le Grand, CA, and the charming, old, heritage-laden house where Gwen lives with her incredibly cool husband, Arlis. 
• Had a fabulous dinner, made by our hosts. 
• Walked around the town of Le Grand and was amazed and delighted by the lasting imprint of Gwen's family on the place. 
• Slept blissfully in the pleasant, cool, valley night air. 
• Went to Fresno to teach a class to an AWESOME group of knitters at Sheeper Than Therapy. 
• Drove up the foothills of the Sierra Nevada to Wilsonia, CA, which is the best-ever little neighborhood of cabins right inside King's Canyon National Park. It has an interesting story that you can read about here and here. 
• Hiked, gawked at giant pinecones, giant trees, giant rocks and amazing views. 
• Played games. 
• Ate fabulous meals. 
• Played more games. 
• Hiked more. 
• Talked and talked with G and A. 
• Hiked and played games and ate. (s'mores made with the little wrapped squares of Ghiardelli chocolate!!!!)
• Took about 500 photos
• Drove back to LA and flew home, having hardly believed I was actually in such a beautiful place. 

But you know I have proof. So here you go. These and a few others are also on Facebook. More photos to come. 

Gwen and Arlis--thank you from our hearts-this trip was very special!

King's Canyon. Amazing. 

In Black and White or Color. It's just gorgeous with
soaring canyon walls and great granite monoliths and domes. 

Me, enjoying feeling Hobbit-like. 

The Cabin

Arlis looks out coolly out on the view from a cool
fire lookout tower. 

Giant Sequoia with a characteristic split
at the bottom that is big enough inside for Eric
and I to live.  Seriously. 

I'm a little crazy about this cabin. 

The boys finished their hike a bit early and waited
patiently for us. 

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66 Months

For almost exactly the past 66 months, up until this past Sunday,  my husband had the unique opportunity to be the Bishop of our Ward. That means he was the minister of our congregation, except in our church, there is no paid ministry, so he did this in his spare time, as a volunteer, in addition to working full time as an attorney. He did all the things that ministers do--gave many talks, taught many classes, counseled the ward members, performed weddings, officiated at funerals, visited the sick and lonely, helped the suffering, oversaw all the staffing of the congregation for the children, youth, women's, missionary and men's programs, spent tons of time with the youth, collected and distributed tithes and donations, etc., etc.

I think about the fact that he was doing this in the margins and tiny spaces of time remaining after being gone from about 6:30 am till almost 7 pm every day just working and commuting.

It doesn't seem possible, does it?

But yet, it was not only possible, it happened. He did it and did it well; and in ways that can only be described as being the evidence of living a life of faith and covenant, he was still successful in his work, an involved and loving dad, and a great husband to me.

Yes, he was gone a lot. It is a huge responsibility. Fortunately, he is blessed with a thick skin, an even-tempered personality and a lot of personal security about his place in the world. He loved the people he served frankly and with all his best effort. For him, it was completely a privilege to have the chance to do something like this to serve his Heavenly Father.

Since I have a thin skin, a moody personality and no personal security about my place in the world, as I look back, there were plenty of days when I was less than the perfectly supportive wife that I could have been. Overall, I did fine and things were generally good, but yes, I had some hard days.

But Heavenly Father was aware, so there was always peace in the end.

In spite of my weaknesses, the balance sheet shows an increase. An increase in love, an increase in my ability to see the best parts of my husband, an increase in family closeness and unity, an increase in our temporal blessings, and many other increases. There are ideas in religion that are hard to understand because logically they don't seem to make any sense, but to someone who lives them, they come to make perfect sense. One of those is the truth that by giving and sacrificing and not being selfish, you actually gain more real rewards than you would have otherwise. In the scriptures (Luke 9:24) it goes like this:

For whosoever will save his life, must be willing to lose it for my sake; and whosoever will be willing to lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.

To save my own life means to act without faith, to be unwilling to see life in a broader way, unwilling to believe that there is more out there than I can actually see with my human eyes. It's to be limited to the belief that if Eric is spending 10-20 or more hours additional per week doing things for church, that there must be less time for me.

To be willing to lose your life means to live the life that God wants you to live, with the understanding that He loves you and wants what is best, just like a parent. It means to remember that my Heavenly Father's math is not the same as mine and that the time he spent serving others also somehow strengthened our marriage and brought him closer to our kids. It really, actually did.

I like that that scripture includes the word "willing." That is the main thing God expects of us-to just be willing and try. Both Eric and I were as normal and human and imperfect as we could be.  So, we just did our best. And that's the greatest tribute I can give Eric right now, is that he really, really did his best. He cares so deeply for the hundreds of people that he had living inside his head for all this time. He thought about them all the time and prayed about how to help them. He knew them all by name and could tell you something about every one of them who let him get to know them.

So, hopefully you can see, that this was a big thing for him and for our family. Culturally, in our church, people express one of two things to a Bishop and his family: Congratulations for reaching such a "prestigious" position in the church or condolences for having to take on such a terrible task. Neither sentiment fits in the slightest.  There is no prestige in it, other than knowing that your Heavenly Father trusts you with this job. And even though it is hard, it is no terrible task. It's just the simplest, sweetest, purest kind of service-the kind that asks you to dig deep but gives richly in return.  It has been a glorious time for our family, full of happy and sad experiences, spiritual maturing, opportunities to grow our faith, and chances to get better at loving other people.

He will miss this assignment a lot. Which is okay. That is another proof that he put all he had into it. I'm so proud of him for everything he did.

Here he is with the young women of the ward. He loves them
a lot, even though this is not a smiley photo. They saw his humor
and good heart. 

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25 Wonderful Years

Yep, 25 years ago today, in the Washington Temple,  Eric and I got married. Eric insists on the word "Wonderful" always being associated with the "25."  Sometimes as a declaration, sometimes as a reminder, haha. And here we still are. When I asked Evan if he and his siblings had planned a big surprise party for us, he started slightly (there is no party planned), then said with a wry smile, "Well if we had, I wouldn't exactly be able to tell you about it, now would I?"

It's totally okay there won't be a party, and actually, his quick-witted answer rather delighted me. It made me think about how in our family, humor is one of the best things we have going for us. We laugh a lot.
I'm glad about that.

The first photo is from the bridal shower that Eric's mom threw for me. We'd been engaged a couple of weeks and while I was not at all expecting to be engaged at that point in my life, the strong friendship that we had established translated over to being engaged, and I think this photo shows that.

The other photos were taken by me and my self-timer as we stood on our front porch just before going out to dinner last night. I wore flowers in my hair to celebrate and we went to our favorite French place to eat great food and talk about regular stuff and feel grateful for our life together. The time together and the amazing food were our gifts to ourselves, and it was a great evening. The waiter got on board when we told him why we were there and brought our desserts with candles because he said it is a day for making wishes. That actually brought a tear to my eye. So we both wished for at least 25 more years and laughed some more.

1986

2011

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All Hail the Groupon

This July, Eric and I will celebrate 25 years since our marriage. As Eric always appends, "25 WONDERFUL years." He means it, too, bless his heart-it's the one thing he says that's never sarcastic.  It seems strange to say, but it has gone very, very quickly. As in a dream almost. I look back and years compress into moments and moments into memories that seem as fleeting as drops of water running down a window through which I'm viewing my life.

There's a lot about 1986 that I want to remember though, so we've started celebrating already. My knitpal Gwen and I were going to go on a teaching cruise through the Panama canal and our husbands were going to come along and that was going to be the big, over the top celebration for the silver anniversary. But it didn't sell, so we're not going, so I have to come up with another way to mark the occasion.  April especially is important in that year, because it is when I got home from my second year of school to find Eric home from his mission and already pretty much a part of my family. I think if we hadn't gotten married, my dad might have filed adoption papers. He was always hanging out at my house, playing with my siblings, helping out my folks, etc.. At this point there was no romance between us, so it was actually kind of annoying at times. But it was all part of the master plan, and he has been a blessing to my family ever since. Some of my siblings were so young at this point that they can hardly remember life without Eric in it.

Anyway, back to the celebrating. Since more is better, so far I've settled on the idea of going on lots of little trips throughout the year. I decided to kick things off by buying a Groupon for a Baltimore B&B called the 1840's Carrollton Inn and this week we had a fun, 21.5 hour extended, overnight date to Charm City, the City that Reads, the Greatest City in America or as Eric (being from Chicago) calls it, a lousy little shot & beer town (so unfair). I instead chose to Believe, Hon, and we went into Baltimore and had a lovely time.

I actually love the city of Baltimore, in spite of Peter Angelos, its much maligned reputation and stupid slogans over the years. Because I grew up mere yards from the city line, I went there often as a child, grew comfortable and familiar with its roads, thrilled to its rich history and found myself proud to be a Baltimoron. (I mean Baltimorean, of course). I can slip into a local accent fairly easily and am able to translate for outlanders who are puzzled by residents warshing things in wooder and drahvin' downyaishin doring the zummer. (washing things in water and driving down to the ocean during the summer) I like that it has recognizable and unique neighborhoods that work to maintain their uniqueness and local flavor. I don't think there is a Starbucks in Fells Point yet. Long may it be so.

This little gem of a B&B was on the edge of one of those neighborhoods--Little Italy--so we were able to walk through the breezy, quiet streets to have dinner in a great little restaurant called La Tavola. It was amazing food, from the goat cheese and walnut salad all the way to the chocolate mousse. I highly recommend it if you need a night away from the suburbs.  We woke up the next morning at the decadent hour of 8 am and had a fabulous, cooked-to-order breakfast in a cozy dining room resplendent with beautiful fabrics and luscious details.

Our room was great. I chose the Caton Suite since I grew up in Catonsville, and it was fun to read the historical explanation on the plaque outside the room and thumb through the more thorough history in the hotel book on inside the room. Here is proof that we were there:

Eric grins cheesily in the entryway.

The hallway leading to the main part of the suite

Eric is amazed by what a good deal we got-all this for the
price of a night at the Holiday Inn Express. 

The view outside the window-these
blossoms were
up and down Lombard Street

We capped off the day with a quick drive up the Jones Falls Expressway to the Baltimore Museum of Art. I took lots of photos, but on film, so hopefully a few will be printable. We looked at lots of wonderful art, enjoyed the blooming magnolia and cherry trees outside the building itself and then got home before the kids arrived from school.

It was just enough to leave me feeling refreshed, with a bit of time to think about something besides my list of to-do's and focus on my love-my husband who works so hard to make all my dreams come true.

25 Wonderful Years indeed.

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Happy Anniversary!

I really feel like I shouldn't go to bed without acknowledging this day. It's my 24th anniversary. I remember my parents' 24th anniversary, because it was the year my first son was born and I remember very clearly that they were old. No really, they were. But actually, my mom was was YOUNGER than me by several months when she celebrated her two-dozenth anniversary. Friends, the time, it is a-changin'. The days and months and years are already starting to wheel 'round faster and faster-it seems like just yesterday I was writing about my 20th anniversary and being amazed at THAT number of years.

Eric and I kissed each other this morning on his way out the door and reminded each other to say, when anyone asked how many years, "Twenty-four WONDERFUL years," all tongue in cheek and smiling. But really, we were pretty serious.
Full of wonder they have been, indeed.
Happy Anniversary, my dearest and most faithful friend.

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