Thursday, June 21, 2007

Two of the Worst Hours of My Life Thus Far...

...were yesterday, but they're over, and today, blessedly, was a new and very wonderful day. There's no point in reliving the series of unfortunate events, but I have hope that there will be mending and healing. Though I'm not going to share the gory details here, I have to say that knowing that loving eyes and caring hearts would be reaching out to me through the fiber-optic network gave me comfort. That, and the perfectly timed company of a wonderful friend. But, like Forrest Gump, that's all I have to say about that.

I'd much rather talk about today! Today was me and 10 kids aged 8-18 on the loose at Six Flags. It was so much fun. I love being an Auntie. I can be so much more fun than I sometimes am as only a mom. Today I wore both hats and it was great. These particular visiting cousins have not spent much time with my kids or the other cousins that live out here, owing to the 2300 or so miles between here and Arizona, but they are close in age, so it was great fun to see them all together. The older ones went off to ride the roller coasters and the younger ones and I took in the gentler rides then parked ourselves at the wave pool to swim the rest of the day away. This picture is only 7 of the 10 heading back into the park after lunch. The other 3 couldn't wait to get back to the fun, so they headed off by themselves. They were totally obedient about checking in every hour, about never going off alone and basically taking care of each other. The highlight of the day was when my darling nephew said to his other cousins, "This was a very enjoyable day!" I think the crush of 9 cousins all in the same place at the same time has been a little bit of an adjustment for him and the fact that he was happy made the day perfect.

Overall, it was exactly what I needed, I just didn't know it. In the middle of all the obligations I've willingly taken upon myself (did that sound rehearsed?), knowing that Eric will be out of town tomorrow and Saturday, I was having serious anxiety about just falling off the map for two days to play with my family, then spending all day Saturday at Seminary Inservice then leaving for camp on Monday morning. Yet, in a very tender-mercies sort of way, in the party atmosphere of this little amusement park; experiencing the sweetly satisfying company of extended family; my brain settled down, my heart stopped racing and I remembered that I had a really great week last week and pretty much have everything under control for next week. I even had my card exchange cards all planned out and had started assembling them in plenty of time. See what happens when I don't have my last minute routine? See what happens when I'm organized? My brain sabotages me. Sheesh. Sometimes I just want to be done with this whole natural (wo)man thing.

Anyhow, in the spirit of gratitude and positive thinking, all is well, really. As most of the tee-shirts I own say, "Life is Good." I like to joke that sometimes I wear those shirts as a declaration and sometimes as a reminder. Today's blue one went on this morning as more of a plea, I think, but ended up being a joyful shout-out to the universe that my current appreciation of continual rebirth really has meaning.

I am looking forward to our Auntie-Cousins day trip to Bethany Beach tomorrow and I am especially looking forward to my seminary meeting on Saturday. Then bring on camp, because it will be great too, mostly because I won't be doing it alone. I forgot that and got tricked into thinking I was alone, but I never was, and never will be.

"We turn not older with years, but new every day." -Emily Dickinson

5 comments:

  1. Your cards are gorgeous, by the way. Did you photograph one of your own roses? You're so talented!

    I am glad you had a great day today after a hard time yesterday. A cousin fest at an amusement park sounds very fun, indeed. What great memories you and your children are making!

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  2. I am inspired by your attitude in the midst of trial! So glad you had a good day at Six Flags and your cards are so pretty!! Hang in there Kellie, and I hope you have a great time at camp!!

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  3. I'm impressed that you managed to let yourself calm down and have fun at the amusement park. Sometimes I wonder why I plan "fun" things--like today's campout . . .

    Good luck with the bad times, and have fun with the good ones. I bet you're a great auntie!!

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  4. I love what you said about your "life is good" shirts. It is nice to have a blatant reminder sometimes. (I put them on Talia...it's nice to read that line when she is being naughty!)

    I can't wait to read about the wonderful things in your life in the weeks to come. We need to put a day on the calendar for us to get together and talk photography. =)

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  5. I hope you are having a fantastic time at girls camp. I am so glad you got to spend time being the fun one at the amusement park with your family. I live for those moments of family bliss.

    Your attitude is inspiring. You are a wonder to me, and I love reading your thoughts about life.

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Thank you for sharing your insights!