The Last Twenty-One

My youngest child turned 21 years old on Friday. That feels like a big deal, so I wanted to write about it for a minute.

Here he is 3 years ago when he graduated high school:

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52 Stories: A Birthday, Gatherings and Family

I found some photos of a family gathering at our first house. From the ages of the children and my haircut, I am fairly certain this is Eric's birthday in 1990, so his 28th.

The official #52Stories question I found on FamilySearch had to do with what sacrifices your parents made to make holidays magical. Riffing off of that, these photos are special to me because they remind me of all the times my parents and siblings made the effort to gather together for birthdays and holidays.

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A Happy Birthday to Sara

Twenty-two years ago today, I became the mother of a daughter. After 3 sons, it was not a sure bet in my mind, and back then, when they looked at the blurry sonogram and told me I was having a girl, I didn't actually believe it 100% until she arrived.

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Forty-Nine

Last Sunday was my 49th birthday. I think I confused some people when I said in a recent Instagram post that I would be entering my 50th year, but it's true. I have finished 49 years, and have now begun my 50th year. Lots of people use this time as a touchstone, a time to get busy making unfulfilled dreams come true or go to places they've always wanted to go. I love hearing about those kinds of years for people, especially if it means that there is discovery and joy.

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Johnathan's Birth Story

Every so often, I get the urge to tell one of my kids' birth stories. Today is Johnathan's turn. I scanned some photos of his Birth Day and became quite emotional looking at our younger selves, his and mine.

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Samuel at age 20

My third child turned 20 today. I don't have a current photo of him because he is, at this very moment serving a mission for the Lord in California and he is working too hard to send me any photos. :o) I do like this picture because it makes me laugh that he wanted photos in his jacket and tie but could only muster getting dressed up from the hips up.  As it should be.

I did get to talk to him the week before his birthday on Mother's day and it was wonderful to hear his voice and know how happy he is. He's healthy, busy, beloved by his associate missionaries and doing just great.

Here is the best part about having a missionary son. Even though I know my kids love me and I love them, the letters we write while they are away from home are amazing because they give us the opportunity to put it all in words.

Subject: Hi Momma
Just thought I'd get one quick note in
I love you. 

Thanks for being my momma
Love
Elder Nuss

Dear Momma,
Just to let you know, my camera has been deathly ill until recently, so I will be able to resume taking pictures now!
Also, I love you and appreciate you. The more I think on your life, the more I say, "Man, my mom is awesome"
Love
Elder Nuss


Subject: Hi Mom
I love you
Elder Nuss

So, he may be gone from my sight and my arms and my immediate orbit, but each week I receive treasures like that to read and ponder. It doesn't really feel like a sacrifice when I see what is happening to his heart, his mind, his spirituality, his resolve and his knowledge of who he truly is.

And so today, Dear Sam,  even thought I can't wish it in person, a very, very happy birthday to you from me.
Love,
Mom

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Johnathan at 22

My second son happens to be living at home right now, so we had the opportunity today to celebrate his birthday with him. We pulled out all the stops for dinner and had grilled porterhouse steaks, corn on the cob, grilled zucchini, bread and my pal's outstanding homemade pesto. What a meal. I'm nearly asleep as I try to digest. While we take a break and get ready for cake and candles, Johnathan is allowing me to interview him.

Me: How was your day?
J: It was busy.
Me: In a good way?
J: Yeah, I never regret being busy. I was getting ready for Jorge to come from Spain. It was also fun to be able to give people gifts on my birthday as I delivered my presents from Spain.
Me: What do you see happening for you in the next year?
J: I see myself living on my own, preparing to move on to the next phase of my life.  Sometime I want to get married a start a family, so I need to prepare for that to happen with work and education.
Me: What was something good that happened in the past year:
J: Returning home after serving an honorable full-time mission. When I say that, I'm also glad that I got home ready to keep going, knowing it was another beginning, not an end, and that I had put in my best efforts and worked my hardest.
Me: How do you most enjoy spending your free time right now:
J: In the company of friends with whom I have a lot in common.
Me: What's something you want the world to know about you right now?
J: That I'm secretly black. Just kidding. My real answer is that life is very good and that I'm enjoying it a lot.
Me: Anything else?
J: Nope.
Me: Happy Birthday!

Johnathan has always been a great person. I homeschooled him for 3 years and when he went back to school I genuinely missed having him around. He has a pleasant, kind personality, and he is one of the hardest working people I've ever met. He has a wicked sense of humor and likes to look for the positive aspects of every situation.

I'm thrilled at what a great person he's grown into and can't wait to see what life brings for him.

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Evan's Day

Yesterday (without my camera, sadly), Evan and I celebrated his birthday. I'll try to paint some pictures with words.

The day started out by me making him go to swim practice. His back has been sore again (I can't remember if I reported here that he's recovering from a stress fracture) so I didn't make him go earlier in the week, but thought he ought to go yesterday. I dropped him off at the pool about 5 minutes early, then I went home, grabbed a shower, printed out agendas for my meeting at 10:15 and ran back to get him.

I thought immediately that something was weird because usually he is outside waiting for me, chomping at the bit to go home. Not so. I waited a few minutes and didn't see him, then I suddenly noticed him at the back of the pool on a lounge chair, like he'd apparated there or something, because I had NOT seen him walk across the pool deck. I called out and he came to the car. Something still seemed strange. Then I noticed that he wasn't wet.

Turns out, and this just cracks me up, that because he was a couple minutes early for practice, he went and laid down on the lounge for a minute. He then proceeded to SLEEP THROUGH THE PRACTICE!! No one noticed him laying there. He woke up about a minute before I saw him, which is why he seemed to just appear out of nowhere. Too funny. What a start to the day. It's so surreal to watch him become so typically teenagery--sleeping on a dime and all that.

While I was at my meeting, he stayed awake and organized a party day with two of his best pals. It gives me such a happy heart to tell this story because he's known these guys since he was 3 or 4. We did a little home playgroup/preschool together many moons ago and they've just always been friends. The fact that he wanted to celebrate his 15th birthday with these two, his fellow Musketeers, helps me know that our decision to settle in this neighborhood, this little house, this ward and all that, was truly the right thing. Lifelong friends are rare and precious.

Lunch at Famous Dave's was punctuated by one of the boys sampling the hottest sauce on the table and living through it and lots of other laughs.  There was much of shooting the wrappers of drinking straws at foreheads and quoting from The Emperor's New Groove (perhaps the greatest quoting movie EVER) and playing of the quiz game I keep on my phone. I raised my coolness factor by blasting my classic rock-out playlist in the car and giving them 10 bucks for the arcade at the movie theater.

The movie was X-Men: First Class which had plenty of action, a pretty good plot that significantly improved my understanding of the Cuban Missile Crisis (I always did suspect that Mutants were behind it) and the fun of watching Michael Fassbender (the new Mr. Rochester) and James McAvoy (Jane Austen's Crush in Becoming Jane) be all super-heroic. Nice.

The boys came to our house for a bit before heading off to church youth activities, then Ev ended the day by spending the evening at J's house.

It was a good time-I loved being in their company and seeing the world through their eyes.

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Evan at 15

A birthday interview between me and my youngest on the occasion of his 15th birthday.

Me: How was your birthday this year? (It was this past week)
Evan: Awesome. Probably my favorite birthday ever. (He was at EFY, a church camp for teens.)
Me: What's the best thing about your life at 15?
Evan: I'm halfway through being a Teacher.
Me: Why?
E: Because that means I'm almost a Priest. I can't wait for that.  (He's not planning on becoming a Catholic priest, he's referring to his path through the offices of the Priesthood as administered by my church, which is held by all worthy males over the age of 12.)
Me: What was something good about the last year?
E: (while texting on his phone) A lot of stuff.
Me: Such as?
E: Um, another year of EFY.
Me: Anything else?
E: Um, Jeff getting married? I don't know.
Me: How was your freshman year of high school?
E: Awesome.
Me: Anything specific?
E: No.
Me: What's your favorite way to spend your spare time right now?
E: No answer.
Me: Ev?
E: (annoyed) Whhhaaatttt?
Me: Repeats the question.
E: (sleepily) Nothing.
Me: Are you too tired for an interview right now?
E: Yes.
Me: Okay.

So there you have it. A typical conversation between me and my boy. I missed his birthday in person this year, but he had a great day. The text I got from him after I sent him the birthday song, one line at a time, all throughout the day, was absolutely effervescent with happiness. Really. So, I'm glad for that. He and I have a week alone together coming up while Sara and Johnathan are in Spain, so we'll see some movies and have some lunches out and properly celebrate as much as we can.

Right now Evan is a fun, full-featured young man. He is smart, witty, free-spirited and extremely enjoyable to be around, yet he is also incredibly organized and focused in school, having just completed a rigorous freshman year with a gorgeous GPA. He's athletic and friendly and enjoys being around his family. He makes me smile. I can't imagine life without him and honestly can't believe he's growing up so quickly. I remember him as a calm, happy baby who smiled constantly and basked in the attention of his older sibs, and now he's almost as tall as me and on the cusp of manhood. Time does not fly, it actually just disappears.

He's fallen asleep over on the couch next to me and I can honestly say that even at 15, my kid is still adorable when he sleeps.

Happy Birthday Ev! I love you!

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Seventeen

It hardly seems possible, but today my second youngest and only daughter turned seventeen. We had a regular day, but she was blessed by many small expressions of love from family and friends. We aren't big into gifts just for that day, but we did take a favorite treat to the youth activity to share with all her church friends. She spent the day in school, interacting with friends,  doing homework and helping out at a service project. In that way, the day was a microcosm of her life right now-she spends most of her time doing those very things, usually with a wonderful sense of humor and joy about life. She's not interested in a birthday photoshoot, but I adore this imperfect shot from our outing on Monday night. I framed an ordinary shot of the azaleas and she danced down the stone steps to join her brothers and made it into a totally different photo.  I wasn't expecting her, but there she was, adding a light-hearted sweetness to the scene. In much the same way, she danced into our boy-centered world all those years ago and I felt indeed blessed to have one dear daughter.  In spite of an ultrasound during my pregnancy that indicated she was indeed a girl, after 3 boys, I refused to really believe it until she was in my arms. She continues to add so much to our family.

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