A Moment for John

I honestly can't remember not knowing John and his family. It feels like it has been my whole life even though I was probably more like 10 or 11 when I first met them.

John died this week after a grueling battle with cancer and I have memories in my mind and connections to moments in my life that are so important to me that this has been a tender week--this grief is etching itself onto my emotions with a sharpness I haven't felt since my Grandpa died a few years ago. John and his wife feel like family and I am sad he is gone from this life and that she has to be without him. I feel the actual sensation of my heart breaking a little bit each time a memory passes through my mind.  He and she have always made me feel like I was the awesomest thing on the planet; like I was smart, capable and something special, and this from the time I was small up to the last time I saw him as an adult. The best compliment I can give them is that I think everyone who knows them feels exactly the same way I do. It's just excellent to be near either one of them.

Images flicker past like an old-fashioned film. He picked me up when I babysat his daughter (and fed his pet tarantula) and his former-cop driving was exciting to say the least. He hired me to work in his office when we had a youth service auction at church and I remember him telling me I could grow up and do anything I wanted. At that moment I believed him and felt my life's horizons open up a little.  He was present at my marriage. He was a friend to my parents. He served me and my family at church. He helped out at countless youth conferences and activities. He always had a story to tell and to this day I can't drive to Harper's Ferry without Watching for Falling Rock and smiling to myself.  My children have felt that same fondness that I always felt. He always looked like he was trying not to laugh out loud and his eyes actually did twinkle as that constant, just slightly suppressed smile played around his mouth. I heard him bear earnest testimony of his faith and his belief in the Savior. I heard him complement his wife in public and express his gratitude for her.

How grateful I am for the knowledge I have that God is good and that families and friendships exist and endure far beyond this fragile time on earth. In the meantime I will enjoy thinking of all the times this lovely gentleman made me smile and made the world just a little more interesting and rich.

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The Story of the Irresistible Force and the Immoveable Object

Once upon a time there was a huge list that all seemed to be priority 1 or 2. No 3's or 4's in the bunch. Add to that a huge holiday in 6 days, 2 dr. appointments, a funeral, 2 wrestling meets, 3 family members coming into town and all the usual stuff like laundry and cooking and breathing and sleeping and all that.

Yep, we're all there this week. Time is the irresistible force. 115 hours till Sunday. The List is the immoveable object.  We all have one. So what are the options? There is really only one and that is to choose peace. Yes, choose it. It is something I have to do everyday. At times like this anxiety rises in my body like a flood and it threatens always to carry me,  flailing,  down a raging torrent, far from where I want to be.

Instead, I must choose peace.

While it seems a simplistic solution, it really entails everything. To choose peace is to acknowledge the Irresistible Force and the Immoveable Object, take note of the trajectory, and then step out of the path of the collision. Yep, I'm just going to move to higher ground. That is all I can do. The collision still happens so Yes, that means there be some carnage in the way of things undone, or done imperfectly. Packages will arrive after Christmas, but will contain just as much love on Monday as on Sunday. The daughter's trim and closet doors might not get painted till January and yes, the room might have to be partly dismantled again. That might be the best thing to happen so that I can sleep, or spend meaningful time with my sister and kids, or take the time to properly think about and honor the life of our dear friend who just died. The fridge and cars might have to wait another week to get cleaned and yes, I may feel embarrassed at how they look. So yes, stepping to higher ground doesn't mean that the stuff I fear won't happen. The force still meets the object, it just means I'm not in the way. I'm not getting shredded by the shrapnel. I'm watching, but I've got my kevlar body armor on and I am remembering that people, not things are important. Feelings and kindness expressed are more important than getting the list checked off.

So, here I go, putting on my playlists with names like "Favorite Christmas" and "Upbeat" and turning the speakers up loud and JUST. DOING. WHAT. I. CAN. With all the love in my heart.

Please have a Merry Week Before Christmas, friends.

And live happily now, ok?  Ever after will take care of itself.

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Happy News

I got this email from my eldest son today. Holy cow, friends! I have a son who is a college graduate! I'm actually quite overcome. I love that he thought to capture this moment and share it with me.  I'm so very proud of who he is becoming. It is a humbling thrill (is that combination even possible?) to think that I have had even the least part in that process.
Congratulations to Jeff for this accomplishment and to Ashlyn for being right there with him! We love you both so much!

Jeff
to Eric, me

I just graduated from college. Just figured I'd let you guys know. I love you both. Thanks for helping me become who I am today. This was my last assignment I had to email to my teacher, so I graduated at the click of a button. Seems appropriate in this day and age.

Jeff

Begin forwarded message:

From: Jeff <>
Date: December 15, 2011 8:27:32 PM MST
To: Jeffrey <>
Subject: Graduation

here it is

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The Best Day

Sunday was a day of Fasting in my faith. We spend a special day fasting once each month. In connection with that,  at church in the main worship service, instead of the usual planned talks, congregants can go up as they feel prompted and share their unscripted testimony. It is always a personal, tender and inspiring meeting, and there is always a sense of the unknown because you just really never know what folks will say.

This time we got the surprise of our lives as a gentleman unfamiliar to all of us slowly revealed in a wonderfully-told story that he is acquainted with our missionary son Sam! He lives in California and Sam is serving in the man's hometown. We had no idea at all when he started telling his story and when he got to the moment where he spoke of Elder Nuss, I gasped out loud and began immediately to weep as I realized what he had just said. It was so electrifying and touching for me to have this moment of connection, to have the miles and the separation between me and my third son instantly fall away. This man had just had dinner with my boy last Wednesday night! He had a picture on his phone! He reported how things were going for Sam. It was brilliant. The tears are coming again just thinking about it.  I can hardly put into words the sweet feelings that flooded through me as I thought of my son out there doing what he's doing. Not only is Sam well, but he's BEING everything I could ever wish for him to be. And I have an eyewitness account, a rare and sweet thing for the mom of a missionary. I realized yet again that what my children BECOME is what brings the best and most permanent joy. This was a pure moment of that best kind of joy.

 The memory of that gift of a story has been like a warm air current carrying me up and up and up, then I soar down, remember again, smile and get carried up again.

I will forever grateful for this dear man taking time out of a very busy business trip to drive an hour out of his way to come to our little church meeting and bring such sweet tidings.

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Thinking and Thanking

I'm home from church today sitting with a cat that is about to pass from this life. We've had her about 11 years and she's a sweet little thing. We let our cats run inside and outside and one risk of that decision is disease, and she has one of the untreatables. So, she'll die soon after having lived a happy life full of lots of petting, snuggling, all the sunbeams she would ever want to lay within, plenty of fresh air,  trees to climb, squirrels to bother and fireflies to chase. She used to follow my kids to school, right to the corner where they crossed with the crossing guard. They often reported that they would turn around and see her and she would stop and act all nonchalant, like she just happened to be there. A few minutes later she would show up at the door, give me a very pointed and salutatory look that always seemed to say, "Report: All is well, they made it to the crossing guard, " then sweep past me like she'd finished a secret mission and go take a nap. She was always loyal to us and the kids and it was a comfort to see her around.

She seems to be comfortable, just tired and ready to be free of her broken little body, and I didn't want her to be alone. I know. Many of my best friends are not animal people and may think I'm nuts to go on so about a kitty. I'm okay with that. I don't really understand a lot of things other people do, so it all evens out. I am one of those folks who easily connects with animals, perhaps because my own thought processes are so simple and basic and sometimes humans just wear me out. Animals just love you and appreciate you with complete trust. Even cats. It actually seems a little miraculous to me when a soft, friendly kitty comes and sits upon my chest and looks at me. I am certain she is telling me about her day and asking about mine. It's the closest I come to telepathic, wordless communication. I feel good and peaceful inside. So, it seems right to try and give this little orange gal some comfort and company in her final hours after she's been such a faithful companion to our family.

As I sit here, I have time to consider our lovely holiday weekend in Kentucky. We went there to celebrate Thanksgiving with two of my sisters and their families. The rest of our family was scattered hither and yon around the world, so it was good to be together with about 15 of us, plus my sister's in-laws. Thanksgiving just seems better to me with a big crowd.

All the traditions were observed with propriety. We made my mom's rolls and her sweet potatoes, the in-law's special stuffing (which was delicious), a parade of desserts both old and new, and all the other usual autumnal delicacies. We prayed and laughed and everyone helped out and the house was filled with noise and laughter and giving of orders and much moving of tables and washing of dishes. All as it should be.

There were photo shoots and hi-jinks and an excursion to a local light display. There were camel rides and baby yaks to pet and even a kangaroo. It was good times for all.

The 8-hour drive to and from was peaceful, yet again through the rolling hills of West Virginia and Western Maryland, and this time I got to just ride and listen to my book while the kids dozed and watched a movie or two. Travel now is easy, with everyone able to pack and carry all their own gear. That is a nice thing about this time of life and motherhood. No more frenetic traveling circus moments. We just...go.

Now we're back and the wonderful feeling of the holidays is here. The music has started playing, the house is getting stripped down in preparation for it's holiday finery, and we are making plans and joking about gifts. In spite of the marketplace doing its best to steal Thanksgiving from us by starting all the holiday sales even earlier, and in spite of the world being crazier and more upsetting by the minute, the feeling of the holidays prevails, if we choose to acknowledge it and ignore all the noise. It's possible.
I am thankful for so many, many things.

Here are a few of them:

9 of 26.5 grandchildren on my side

My Sis and BIL

What would a visit to a Christmas wonderland be without a train ride?

My niece really loved her camel ride. 

Aerial view of the final prep before the big feast.

All ready to eat!

My other Sis and BIL. They obliged me with a very early, chilly photo shoot so I could practice some new techniques.

Hot tub + teen boys + free time = crazy hair, fun times and a wet lens. It was worth it. 

The official Thanksgiving portrait, 2011
Kentucky

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Light in November

I am outside on this iconic Autumn afternoon
Warm breezes play with my hair
And leaves fill the air around me
Flying, spinning, floating everywhere
It is the same dance they do every year

But it always delights me like something brand new and miraculous

Soon we will shutter our doors and wrap ourselves up
And the light will flee ever southward
Leaving the great arms of trees reaching
Up into cloudy-grey skies
That I will see out of protecting windows

There is time yet for the stillness and cold of an Eastern winter

Today is yet mild, and all golden and green
Filled with rustle and movement
I am part of this great last breath
Before the seasons change again
And I will move inside

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Laughter on a Sunday Evening

We do this fun thing with my son and daughter-in-law which is that we skype with them every Sunday night. It's become a tradition and when we miss it, it matters. Tonight there was no skyping because they just moved into a new apartment and have no internet connection yet, but we all crowded around one phone on speaker and had some good old-fashioned breathless laughing together.

I mean HILARIOUS stuff.

I just recently had the chance to look up the definition of that word and one of the featured ones is "boisterously merry." Yes. That about covers it. And it did my heart good.

There were guffaws to be heard about everything from the usual sibling name-calling to the dishes Jeff was washing to their new-to-them car (a 1993 Buick Park Avenue free from Ash's grandma-tell me that is not a car worthy of some boisterous merriment when you are 24 and 21 years old!) to my husband's singing voice and back again to the name calling.

My kids laughing together will always be one of the best sounds my ears can hear.

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A Grand Day

Thanks to Eversave and a day off of school, yesterday we found ourselves in rural Lancaster County, PA, all rigged up and flying through foliage so beautiful it didn't seem real. Eric took the day off, the weather was amazing, our guides were perfect and all this combined to make a seriously fun memory. Standing 50 or 60 feet above the ground in the midst of this great Eastern forest that I love so much, with the leaves at their absolute most colorful, was an amazing experience. I'm so pleased it all worked out and that we could carve out this time together. I can enthusiastically recommend the Refreshing Mountain Camp as a great place to have a day out with your family.

Getting rigged up. 

Waiting for the first zipline. 

Evan gets attached. These guides were so
expert and smooth. 

Sara gets ready to go. 

After the first zipline we had to get across a ropes course. 

Sara looks like she's floating in midair. Sometimes it felt
that way. 

Spider Man

I was WAY out of my comfort zone, let me tell you, but
learning to rely on that magical yellow strap and step out into
the air was a good experience. 

Eric makes it across the swings. 

Our view standing IN the trees. I loved this part. In the
distance is our next platform. 

Another view of the gorgeous surroundings. It was such a
cool experience to be in the canopy. 

The sky was perfect. 

The shadow of us on the platform against the other trees. 

I think this is Eric getting ready to fly from the
platform in the top center of the image. 

Our crew!

The view from the edge of the platforms.

Looking down to the ground from the last
platform. 

Looking back up from the ground at the end
of the course.

The kids with our cute guides. They were high-quality
young men.

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Yay 45!

There are seasons to life, yes? For me, in my mid-forties, this metaphorical late Summer is multi-faceted. Life truly is good: golden and warm and colorful for the most part.  If I live to be about 90, I am in the middle of  my years. It's very exciting to think that I have at least 45 more of those years as an actual adult to learn and try and experience all that the world has to offer.

Right now though, one thing sobers me, and that is the state of this body of mine, this fair vessel of experiential amazingness.  I need it to stay strong for another 45 years and my latest little piece of medical enlightenment has reminded me that nature is against me. I feel certain that this is why people have mid-life crises. I promise I won't go buy a motorcycle or anything, but sheesh it's frustrating to see your own super-powers start to weaken.  A few years ago my doctor took down my family medical history; it is filled with many of the baddies such as diabetes, arthritis, high blood pressure, mental illness, etc., and said, with an almost gleeful interest in my potentially fascinating case, "Well, you're just a ticking time bomb, aren't you?"  I didn't appreciate it much at the time, but feared she was right.

This week, the diminishing numbers ticked ever closer to that detonation with a straightforward diagnosis of arthritis. I've had bits of it in some of my joints for a long time, most people do. Now it is a constant thing and spreading-wrists, ankles, hips, shoulder, and most recently, back. I figured that some of the stuff I was experiencing was arthritis, and other things now make sense, such as the fact that I don't actually feel like doing anything at all in the mornings because it feels better to stay warm under my covers for a while, and that about 1 day out of 3 I just feel awful, like I have the flu. I have to admit though, it never occurred to me that the pain in my back was also the dreaded A, not something fixable, like the disc problem the doctor first suspected. Arthritis means it's permanent and will only get worse. Degenerative is the medical term. Love that.

What's to be done? Exercise (one of the great ironies of arthritis is that movement reduces pain and stiffness, but that pain and stiffness make it hard to move-thus it has been for me lately), losing weight, NSAIDs, and a positive attitude. At least until I find out if it's the Osteoarthritis I would get from my dad (and the universe in general) or the Rheumatoid type I could get from my mom. Then it would be a whole 'nuther bundle of fun, baby. Oh yeah.

I realize that as medical problems go,  this currently does not rate too highly on the metric of drama and difficulty.  Nearly everyone has or gets arthritis in some form.  I'm still walking around and I can do everything I need to do.  I know.  I just need a minute to assimilate this information and adjust, because for me, having watched the bodies of members of my family be absolutely ravaged by arthritis in various forms, this is actually a little bit terrifying.

I'll get over it, though, because the good news is that those same family members are brave and amazing and incredibly strong, so I have a really good road map for how to handle things. I still get to choose how to live each day, pain or not.

So here I am, smack in the middle of my life, trying to enjoy all the sensations of a set of bones in middle-of-life condition.  I can't worry though, I have to be ready for all the pending good times. I Am Middle-Aged! Hear Me Creak!

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A Fall 2011 Road Trip, part 3

Thursday-Sunday was Stitches East, one of the conferences where I teach. It is a fun, comfortable environment, and I have good friends there. I had fantastic students and lots of good experiences in my classes. I truly do love teaching, so I'm grateful for this opportunity that I have. Thursday started at 11 am with  a speed-dating style introduction to the teachers so I got to meet about 100 students in a very short time and give them a little information about myself. That same afternoon I taught my first three-hour class. After that I did an impromptu photo-shoot for another teacher friend who had to send a project off for publication. Some of us went out for dinner, then there were teacher meetings in the evening, then off to bed. Friday was a full day of teaching a quick succession of one-hour technique sessions in the market, then helping out at the industry fashion show. Because the whole experience involves thinking on my feet all day, being with people I like and being inspired by the beauty and camaraderie of knitting, I find these long days mostly energizing. I'm tired by the end, but in a way that tells me I've done my best all day long. I like that feeling.

The pace continued into Saturday with another full day of Market Sessions, then the student banquet, where folks show off their own knitting creations. Saturday night usually includes a little relaxing time with friends, and that was a fun time. On Sunday, the mood noticeably changes as many students and teachers have already gone home or are preparing to leave. My first class starts a little later, so the morning is slower. My Sunday afternoon class is a very quiet, relaxed class that I love teaching because it seems to actually help knitters solve some problems and feel more comfortable about certain techniques.
I admire how hard they work and how curious they are about the process.

As soon I was done teaching, I raced to get myself together and got on the road right when I wanted to-about 5:30. I saw some but not all of my pals before taking off, but it's all good-I'll see them again in February. The trip was a predictable 6 hours and thankfully, my hip behaved and the pain held off until right when I got home. That was what I was praying for since I was driving alone and didn't want to have to stop every hour to walk around. I got by with one stop for gas and lots of good music and a big bag of yummy junk food. Traffic was kind of bad in CT, but there were no problems at all around NYC and the NJ turnpike.

Getting home was so awesome. Eric and Johnathan were still up to help me haul in all my stuff, and my little house felt so warm and welcoming. I threw my stuff in a pile in the living room, let my mind wind down a bit and went to sleep, turning over all the fun times of the last 9 days, but so happy to be back.

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A 2011 Fall Road Trip, part 2

Let me pick up the story of my 9-day odyssey up and down the east coast. First let me mention that I have not forgotten that I have a husband and 3 kids at home, but they seem to be doing just fine. We tend to be an independent bunch, but the occasional text and phone call has continually eased my mind that all is well. Sara went to a concert this week and had a great time, Ev spent time with friends, but his back is hurting again, so we'll have to return to the Dr. before wrestling starts up. Eric is taking in the first days of post-Bishophood with his usual sanguine attitude toward life. I'm sure it's been emotional for him, but he's finding the good parts and keeping busy. Yesterday he helped someone in the ward move, which is exactly how he would choose to spend free time, which I love. I've hardly heard from Johnathan, but I take that as a good thing. 22-year olds actually should be too busy to call mom without a reminder, and he is busy working and being scholarly, yay for him.

After the Sheep and Wool show last weekend I simply savored life with Erin and her family for a few days. Her husband was away on business, so it was just us women and the kids. It was deliciously cozy and comfortable to be there. I love her kids and my heart swelled with happiness each time one of them would snuggle in to let me read them a story or that adorable 18-month old would reach up for me to pick him up. Oh the joy. Seriously, I don't know what I would do without little children around me. Sometimes the fact that I've never grown up is a wonderful thing. Children just feel like my tribe.

Monday I took a few maternity photos for Erin and was grateful yet again for the view I get through my camera. She is truly beautiful, inside and out, and the privilege of trying my best to let the rest of the world see that about the people I photograph is something I hope I never take for granted. 

One of my personal faves from our
photoshoot.

I thought this shot was a total failure, so
I laughed out loud when I saw the binky
in focus. What a deal!

I'm a lucky girl to have such a friend. 

Wednesday night I drove from NY over to Hartford, CT for the last leg of my journey, Stitches East, one of my regular teaching gigs. So, since I have to start packing up, I will save that report for one more post.

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A 2011 Fall Road Trip, part 1

Today is day 7 of my big autumn trip and I have 2 days more till I go home. That's a long time. It's been good times though, and the family seems to be doing fine, so it's all good. I have a little time this morning, so I'm going to try and catch up on writing about it.

Last Friday I left home around 4:30 pm and drove up to one of my favorite places to visit-West Point, NY. My wonderful friend Erin lives there. The last two years I've gone up to visit for a day or so before heading over to Hartford, CT for Stitches East. This time I spent a glorious 5 days with Erin and her family because there were two shows on two successive weekends so I just decided to stay all the days in between.
I got to Erin's around 9 Friday night and we visited till way too late, but it was so fun to see her in her beautiful advanced state of expectingness  and catch up and talk and talk and talk. Saturday and Sunday I worked at Nora's booth at Rhinebeck (the NY State Sheep and Wool Festival) and Holy Cow, was that a busy place. It brought back memories of working Cloverhill at our own MD Sheep and Wool festival. I didn't get to see a bit of the festival in full sway, only before it opened and after it closed. We were that busy. No walking around time, but it was fine-good to be busy. I had my new phone and with its extra antennas, it was the star of the show for processing all the credit card transactions, so I'm glad that worked out. Isn't Nora's shop pretty?

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66 Months

For almost exactly the past 66 months, up until this past Sunday,  my husband had the unique opportunity to be the Bishop of our Ward. That means he was the minister of our congregation, except in our church, there is no paid ministry, so he did this in his spare time, as a volunteer, in addition to working full time as an attorney. He did all the things that ministers do--gave many talks, taught many classes, counseled the ward members, performed weddings, officiated at funerals, visited the sick and lonely, helped the suffering, oversaw all the staffing of the congregation for the children, youth, women's, missionary and men's programs, spent tons of time with the youth, collected and distributed tithes and donations, etc., etc.

I think about the fact that he was doing this in the margins and tiny spaces of time remaining after being gone from about 6:30 am till almost 7 pm every day just working and commuting.

It doesn't seem possible, does it?

But yet, it was not only possible, it happened. He did it and did it well; and in ways that can only be described as being the evidence of living a life of faith and covenant, he was still successful in his work, an involved and loving dad, and a great husband to me.

Yes, he was gone a lot. It is a huge responsibility. Fortunately, he is blessed with a thick skin, an even-tempered personality and a lot of personal security about his place in the world. He loved the people he served frankly and with all his best effort. For him, it was completely a privilege to have the chance to do something like this to serve his Heavenly Father.

Since I have a thin skin, a moody personality and no personal security about my place in the world, as I look back, there were plenty of days when I was less than the perfectly supportive wife that I could have been. Overall, I did fine and things were generally good, but yes, I had some hard days.

But Heavenly Father was aware, so there was always peace in the end.

In spite of my weaknesses, the balance sheet shows an increase. An increase in love, an increase in my ability to see the best parts of my husband, an increase in family closeness and unity, an increase in our temporal blessings, and many other increases. There are ideas in religion that are hard to understand because logically they don't seem to make any sense, but to someone who lives them, they come to make perfect sense. One of those is the truth that by giving and sacrificing and not being selfish, you actually gain more real rewards than you would have otherwise. In the scriptures (Luke 9:24) it goes like this:

For whosoever will save his life, must be willing to lose it for my sake; and whosoever will be willing to lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.

To save my own life means to act without faith, to be unwilling to see life in a broader way, unwilling to believe that there is more out there than I can actually see with my human eyes. It's to be limited to the belief that if Eric is spending 10-20 or more hours additional per week doing things for church, that there must be less time for me.

To be willing to lose your life means to live the life that God wants you to live, with the understanding that He loves you and wants what is best, just like a parent. It means to remember that my Heavenly Father's math is not the same as mine and that the time he spent serving others also somehow strengthened our marriage and brought him closer to our kids. It really, actually did.

I like that that scripture includes the word "willing." That is the main thing God expects of us-to just be willing and try. Both Eric and I were as normal and human and imperfect as we could be.  So, we just did our best. And that's the greatest tribute I can give Eric right now, is that he really, really did his best. He cares so deeply for the hundreds of people that he had living inside his head for all this time. He thought about them all the time and prayed about how to help them. He knew them all by name and could tell you something about every one of them who let him get to know them.

So, hopefully you can see, that this was a big thing for him and for our family. Culturally, in our church, people express one of two things to a Bishop and his family: Congratulations for reaching such a "prestigious" position in the church or condolences for having to take on such a terrible task. Neither sentiment fits in the slightest.  There is no prestige in it, other than knowing that your Heavenly Father trusts you with this job. And even though it is hard, it is no terrible task. It's just the simplest, sweetest, purest kind of service-the kind that asks you to dig deep but gives richly in return.  It has been a glorious time for our family, full of happy and sad experiences, spiritual maturing, opportunities to grow our faith, and chances to get better at loving other people.

He will miss this assignment a lot. Which is okay. That is another proof that he put all he had into it. I'm so proud of him for everything he did.

Here he is with the young women of the ward. He loves them
a lot, even though this is not a smiley photo. They saw his humor
and good heart. 

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The Benefits of Living on the East Coast

Just now, my younger brother and two of his kids drove off into the early morning on their way to fly to his next assignment for the Air Force. It's a far-away assignment, but luckily for us, we live a lot closer to several major international airports than they used to be at their last location, so it worked out for Phil and family to make us their final base camp for 5 days or so before the big fly-out. What a joy it was. I feel such heart-deep happiness to have seen them, to have held the kids in my arms, to have been called Aunt Kellie (or occasionally Aunt Megan or Aunt Tina-sometimes they couldn't remember at first just which aunt I am), to have talked with my brother and just felt the ease and closeness of family. We will all miss them so much, but will smile for a long time as we think of the memories of this weekend.

Sara and O got some nail-painting time. O would call us,
"My cousin Evan," or "My Aunt Kellie." It was very endearing.

\

My sister-in-law before she and O headed
toward their new home a couple of days before Phil

Phil with his most adorable youngest son

The brothers, my nephews

L took charge of this impromptu little photo-shoot. He chose
the poses and kept asking for more shots with his little
bro. 

Evan and J got along great.  As Ev left for
school today he said, "I'm going to miss
him so much!"

Holy cow this baby is delicious.

He pretty much stole all our hearts

L was a genius with the legos. He is such
a thoughtful, fun eight-year old. I love
that we got to spend some time with him,

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